What kind of car did you say that was?

Narcissism is not only for the Californians, it spreads all across this great country of ours, I think California just has more of it.  California, and Southern California especially, attracts douchebags and has a culture of narcissism, I am sorry, it’s just a fact.  How many failed actor/musicians working jobs they deem “beneath them” because they deserve to be a star and are waiting for their big break are in Mississippi?  Yeah.  None.

That’s just the way it is Cali.  The same way that Portland attracts weirdoes, and Alaska attracts fishermen, and Florida attracts criminals.  Every place has its thing.  California attracts people who think they are better than wherever they came from.

Not EVERY Californian is a narcissistic a-hole.  Of course not.  But I think we can determine by sheer vanity plate abundance alone that it is a higher percentage than any other location.

All that said, I’ve gotten some pretty sweet plates sent to me from all my friends in Washington, and a few great ones from friends in Texas and Indiana as well.  While the abundance is not there, what they make up for in quantity is quality.  Or…maybe not.  I don’t know.  Either way, keep them coming guys!

This post is dedicated to all those assholes out there who want us to know exactly what kind of car they are driving, and/or to whom it belongs.

MOZRIDE

He’s the illest.

FAMUSXD

This XD is famous.  Ask anyone.

MY JUKE

This Juke is his.

XREDRVR

This is a red Rover.  Red Rover, Red Rover send stupid right over.

R[heart]OLEAF

This Leaf is theirs.  It’s their Love O’ LEAF.  Dumb.

CKS A7

Hey, CK, is that your A7?

SFOURME

It’s a S4.  It’s for him.

This is just a few… hey everyone, guess what, I can read.  And anyone who can read your plate, can also read what kind of car it is attached to.  Not only that, but we assume it belongs to you as well.

Idiots.

Knock it off, your cars make you look stupid.

VHS DVD

Hey guys!  You need any DVDs?  What about VHS tapes?  Come into my sweet van and take your pick!

Let’s buy some out of date media from the cool guy in this van with the blacked out windows, one of which has been replaced with duct tape because it has clearly been kicked out from a previous rape gone bad.

Seems legit.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid…

…and sketchy as hell.

U is Stupid

Misspellings on license plates are a given, I mean, there's no way you can fit a 3-5 word phrase in 7 letters without a misspelling or 5.  That said, if you are choosing to put a single word on your car, SPELL THE DAMN THING CORRECTLY!

I mean, seriously.

How stupid does this TUMATO look?

Or how about this guy from TEXUS (sent to me by our Coachella roommates, thanks Cassy and Khaled!)? I realize it is difficult to read, but it definitely says TEXUS

It's worse, in my opinion to misspell a word, than to abbreviate one.  Ok, so you think you are clever little red Honda, well, you aren't.  Someone else, equally not as clever beat you to the punch and so instead of admitting defeat and coming up with something else, you decided to alternate the spelling.  Just as tomatoes are often argued over as to whether or not they are fruits or vegetables, you are being argued about in cars around this fine city as well.  But what we are debating is whether or not you are stupid because you purposefully misspelled tomato to be cute, or if you are just dumb enough to think that's how it's spelled.

Either way, your car makes you look stupid.

And as for Mr. Texus, well, he's equally stupid, but he's stupid in the way that Seahawks license plates are stupid, meaning, I hate them, but I admire the pride.

No one is proud to be a tomato.  Cause that's not a thing.

Knock it off guys, your cars make you look stupid.



Like and share on Facebook!  Follow the page for updates and additional photos and posts!

OMYSOUL

IT'S NOT EVEN A SOUL!

It is a Kia, but it's not a Soul.

Maybe it's a saying that you say all the time, but seriously?  You cannot put this on a make of car that has a model called the Soul.

You just can't.

It's almost as bad as those confusing hamster commercials.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.


Remember to like and share posts and our Facebook page!  Follow the page for blog posts as they come in and extra photos not worthy of full posts!

AMERPWR

I am sure this means something that I don't understand.

I am sure there's some meaning behind it that is distinctly unracist.

But, this car lives or works near my condo downtown and I've seen it over a dozen times, and each time I get a weird feeling in my stomach.

Maybe because I complete the first word to be America.  America Power.

Now, I have nothing against national pride, I am pretty proud to be an American myself, and feel fortunate and blessed that we live in a country where idiots are allowed to express their stupidity all over their cars, and that I am able to judge them from atop my peak on Mount Pious.

All that said, there is something dark feeling about the phrase America Power!

It makes me think of skinheads and Eddie Furlong in American History X.

Of course I realize it is probably referring to the fact that Corvette is an American car, hence he is driving around in "America Power", but that was the third thing I thought of when I saw this plate.

First, I thought it was the dark, weirdly racist feeling phrase "America Power!"

Next, I figured that AMER had to be something I didn't know about, and aside from discovering it is a name in some language, I found nothing that revealed anything interesting, so I went back to the theory that this Corvette was clearly driven by neo-Nazi.

Finally, I associated the car with the plate and arrived at the American car theory.

This took a long time.  This took me seeing the car half a dozen times at least before deciding that the driver probably is not dumb enough to advertise xenophobia, but just dumb enough to not realize his plate makes people think he has it.

Either that, or his name is Amer.  Whatever.

Knock it off Amer, your car makes you look stupid.


Like my FACEBOOK page.  Follow Your Car Makes You Look Stupid!

DIGNGOLD

So you pick your nose.  That's awesome. 

My boyfriend and I spotted this treasure on our way back from Las Vegas in May.  We couldn't get a good photo for the longest time because the desert sun glare was against us, but we ran back into him 100 miles later and snapped this photo.

There are only three options for this plate:

1) He is a gold digger, literally.

2) He is a gold digger, Kanye West style.

3) He is a gold digger (boogers = gold).

Judging based on his truck #2 is out of the question, and, if he were an actual gold digger, he is not very good at it.  That leaves number 3.

This guy picks his nose.  A lot.

It's the first thing I thought of anyway.

I totally pick my nose, sometimes you have to, but I don't advertise it (even though I just did).  In my imagination anyone who reads the plate will then immediately try to peer into his cab to see if he was picking his nose.

We sure did.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.


Follow and like us on Facebook!! 

CNJ4EVR

I hate C.

I hate J.

I hope they've broken up.

NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP!

Seriously.  No one.

At the very least no one on the road.  MAYBE your children do, god forbid, but even they are probably embarrassed by this.

This is what you carve into a tree in the 1920s, not what you drive around town with on a daily basis.

I'm so glad somebody loves you, I'm glad you are so confident in your relationship that you have to make sure everyone knows about it.  It's not sweet.  I'm sorry, it's not.  Sweet is a handwritten note on the windshield saying the same thing.  What this is, is narcissistic and controlling.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.




Remember to like and share posts and our Facebook page!  Follow the page for blog posts as they come in and extra photos not worthy of full posts!

B S

How is this allowed?!

Some very "clever" man got away with this because his name is Buford Smithson or something.

I can only assume that his name is Buford since he's driving around in Jag. 

A bullshit Jag, but a Jag all the same.

WAY RUIN A BEAUTIFUL CAR BUFORD!

This is almost as bad as the lady who drives around my hometown in a Jaguar with GIANT vinyl stickers that say JAGUAR across the windshield and a stuffed Jaguar in the back window, completely defeating the purpose of driving a Jaguar.

Jaguars are classy.

These things are not classy.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.


Follow Your Car Makes You Look Stupid on Facebook!

ALLGOOD

Nope.  All bad.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.




Remember to like and share posts and our Facebook page!  Follow the page for blog posts as they come in and extra photos not worthy of full posts!

UMTR2ME

If this was in any way true, you would not have been actively cutting me off for the second time.

You also would not have that license plate.

I also would not kind of hate you a little.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.



Remember to like and share posts and our Facebook page!  Follow the page for blog posts as they come in and extra photos not worthy of full posts!

[heart]NMIDLF

This one took some work.

This was one of the ones found on Kourtney and my journey back from Coachella in April.  We were two tired girls who saw the heart and thought, (what one always must think when they see the heart), "this means something." Without having yet deciphered the code, Kourtney snapped a photo.

We spent several minutes, eyebrows furrowed.

"What's a dlf?  Loving my dlf?"
"NM like New Mexico?"
"Loving middle f?"

Finally Kourtney shouted, "Lovin' Mid Life!"

As I pulled ahead of the car to confirm the age of the driver, I couldn't help but think, what kind of a midlife crisis haver buys an Infiniti sedan?  Aren't midlife crises reserved for convertible sports cars?  And what kind of a person wants to advertise their age on their car?!  I'm 31 and I nearly burst into tears every time someone asks me how old I am, this license plate is going to make people ask you how old you are.

Then, judging based solely on the appearance of the driver, they will think to themselves, "62 is not midlife.  You'll be dead long before 114."

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.


Remember to like and share posts and our Facebook page!  Follow the page for blog posts as they come in and extra photos not worthy of full posts!