HRMNONE

Well, of COURSE the crazy cat lady in the handicapped parking space would have a vanity plate.  Of course. 

This is the first photo sent to me by a reader. It's good to know when I leave California, there will still be plenty of stupid cars for me to look at, thank you Andrea.

The beauty of this plate is that no one knows what it actually says.  Andrea sent it to me explaining that she thought it said “hormone” or “harmony”; I took one glance and thought for sure it was supposed to say “Hermione”.

In fact, I got kind of excited to write about the kind of person who would put Hermione on their license plate.

However, after further, and still further investigation, I THINK this is supposed to say “Harm No One” or "Harm None".

Well, madam.  Your license plate is clearly effective!  You have people convinced you are an animal loving Harry Potter fanatic with a lovely voice and a hormonal imbalance.  It was not until a full minute of examination that I came up with your message.  Great job.

Vanity plates are seen at a glance on the highway.  In theory they are supposed to be understood by fellow drivers.  If two college-educated women come up with three other explanations for what it means and none of those is accurate, you have failed miserably. 

Miserably. 

Not only that, it makes me want to harm someone.  Not a lot, and not for life, but I sure would like to kick you right in the shins.  As a Harry Potter fan, writing about your hypothetical obsession would have been much more fun.

You have harmed me.  Your license plate is a liar.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.