California -- An Introduction

There is a certain kind of crazed narcissism that comes along with a personalized license plate.  One that does not acknowledge the sheer ridiculousness of having some word or saying emblazened on a vehicle.  They somehow can manage to make a beautiful car look ridiculous (as you will see from some of the luxury automobiles with vanity plates I have found), and often times appear insane.

I will grant a couple exceptions, if your last name happens to be 7 letters, that's ok.  If your first name happens to have 7 letters and you are a teenager, that's ok.  If you drive a classic car, that's ok.  If you have a business vehicle and it is somehow business related, fine by me.  And if your license plate falls into the very small category of truly clever, I'm ok with you as well.  The only example I have of that off hand is one a friend told me about, a Honda Odyssey with an "ILIAD" plate, which even I can't argue with.

California has taken vanity plates to a whole new level.  I can only assume they are super cheap here, because there are 1000x more here than in my home state of Washington.  Not only that, but they incorporate symbols.  Seriously.  I have seen hearts, and stars, and handprints.  HANDPRINTS!  Ooof.

California already is home to what I can only assume are the world's most idiotic drivers.  People here have no concept of blinkers, leaving space, speed limits (I am totally on board with this one), or looking while changing lanes.  I seriously have a 78% chance of dying every time I get on the freeway.  How there are not MORE accidents is beyond me.

For this introductory post, there is no photo.  Instead, I will leave you with a few of the ridiculous license plates that I have had the honor of observing, but have been unable to photograph:

      - a Jeep like vehicle, probably a Jeep, green, with a bike rack and OUTDRZZ on the plate
      - a Toyota Camry, silver, with U [heart symbol] 2BME
      - a Mercedes (A MERCEDES!), silver, with IST [handprint] BUL

Please.  People.  Just stop.  You look insane.  You are ruining your vehicles.  You look crazy and draw more attention to yourself.  I suppose the only positive thing I can say about them, is that if one of you ever does a hit and run, I will have no problem telling the cop that the culprit is the asshole driving the Lexus with SUE[heart]ME (actual plate sighting) California state license plate.

Knock it off, your car makes you look stupid.